Wii pod?

Me: "We really should change Courtney's diaper...she's got quite the pee wad going on.
Nathan: (shakes head)..."Yeah, quite the wee pod."
Maybe this could be an inspiration for a new invention...

Coat or No Coat, That is the Question

Emily wanted to know if she'd have to wear a coat this morning for school. She confessed that she really didn't want to have to wear one...because she'd be chasing the boys on the playground and she might get hot!

Wake Up

Both Nathan and Courtney decided to get up at 6:00 AM this morning. Fun fun. Nathan wanted the TV on. I told him no, but he could snuggle in bed with me. He objected with "but Mom, I was trying ta wake up da sun!"

Obviously no one has informed him that when the sun's not up, we shouldn't be either.

Reasons

On Saturday I had planned to take the kids to the park. All the girls had to do was put a way their laundry and be nice to each other. No such luck. There was wailing and gnashing of teeth when I informed them they had made their choices and missed their chance. After Abby calmed down, she came in and said "Mama, I think I know the reason Emily and I can't get along...I think it's because you make us put away our laundry." Right. Makes perfect sense.

Also during the aforementioned not getting along & half-hearted attempts at laundry putting-away, Emily came upstairs to whine and complain that Abby had called her a such-n-such. Upon questioning, Abby said "Oh no, I wasn't calling her that, I was saying it to satan." Another good one. (How convenient when little sister is standing next to you...say whatever you want and then excuse it by insisting you were just rebuking the enemy.) Clever. They never cease to amaze me.

Crocs

The kids have been excited to get the summer shoes out again. Abby put on her pink 'Crocs' and exclaimed "I love these crotches!" And for some reason she didn't seem to get the significance when I corrected her.

Two Months Old

I take my kids' pictures on each month birthday for their first year of life. Wade helped me with theses. Got Courtney to smile briefly...and then her mood quickly turned sour. She knows she's got a lot of picture taking to put up with as she grows up!

Comparison

So there is this blog I read...it's on my list actually. It's called Resolved 2 Worship. Beautiful title. I don't know why I read it, though. It often tempts me to compare and inevitably decide I don't measure up. I don't personally know the gal who writes it, but she seems amazing. She's younger than me, has 6 children with another on the way--and she homeschools. She's beautiful, runs marathons, and has her own photography business. Most of her blog posts could double as devotionals. She also has a degree in interior design and she and her family recently moved into a former beauty salon turned home--which she single-handedly (sp) redecorated on a budget of about $10. I'm exaggerating but not by much. She often posts these beautiful pictures of her beautiful children frolicking in the beautiful river. She shares what God is teaching her and it's always these deep amazing insights complete with Scripture alongside. Oh--and did I mention she sings and writes music, too? And that she never seems to have a bad hair day or children that fight or struggles in her marriage, or a baby that covers every outfit she owns in urp? (Oh, I forgot--she also makes her girls' clothes--and they always look amazingly cute and trendy.)

I tell myself that the image I paint in my mind of her life cannot be entirely accurate. She can't be perfect. She must have days where she feels the weight of her humanness...or maybe just gets a zit. Well, even if she doesn't, the truth is that I do. Though I love my life, I have plenty of days where I feel like I fall short, days where I not only feel frumpy & dumpy and out of style, but days where I see all my glaring faults and wonder how in the world my kids are going to turn out okay with a mom like me.

The truth though is that I am doing my best, and I am choosing to cling to Jesus and rest in Him. He doesn't judge me like I judge myself. The truth is that God holds my children in His hands. The truth is that although I can't sew a button on to save my life, I have been given gifts and I love using them to serve my God. And the truth is that in God's eyes I am beautiful every day. And as for my character, I am a work in progress and that is how it's supposed to be. He Who began a good work in me will be faithful to carry it to completion. (from Phil. 1:5-7).

Yes, it's not good to compare.

And a Few More Pics :)

Once again, photos courtesy of kelleejeandesigns.com

Portraits

Photos Courtesy of kelleejeandesigns.com (P.S. She's my cousin, and a great photographer! She came to our house and took these in our basement.)

Jest Like Dem Heiffers

Nathan is positively fascinated by watching Mom pump breast milk. Sits with his face 2 inches from the apparatus and the goods. Yesterday he watched, mesmerized, and exclaimed "It's dis wike da cows on Gwampa's farm!"...Yeeeaaah...just like that...or not.

Nathan also asked me if the milk is kept in my saggy tummy. No, in fact I'm trying to get rid of my saggy tummy sweetie. No milk's in there fortunately.

Weekends

Weekends are tough. Wade's work schedule is such now that he has to work Saturdays and Sundays, AND doesn't get home until after 6:15 or so. I dread weekends. I pray my way through them. Yesterday I was Demon Mama, though. Screamed at my kids and then had to ask for forgiveness. We had a lesson in "in your anger, do not sin," with me as the example of what NOT to do.

We usually try to go to church Saturday nights, with Wade now having to meet us there late when he gets off of work. Last night we didn't make it at all. So this morning, 4 kids or not, I decided I needed to be at church. So we went. Glad we did. So thankful for a church where truth is spoken, and communicated in such a way that God's Word seems fresh and new each time you hear it. It's not about being entertained, or just feeling good in the midst of my favorite music though--in fact, often the styles or songs may not even be my favorite. But it's about bringing my mind and heart before God, offering Him a sacrifice of praise and waiting expectantly for Him to meet me where I'm at. So that's what I did. And He met me.

Courtney's Entertainment Plan

6 week old baby Courtney's got a good line up for the folks in church to keep 'em entertained during the service, and she tried out her tactics this past weekend in the cry room--which was fairly full this week I might add. Here are her strategies:

1.) Nurse loudly--must make slurping noises, too.
2. ) Sit up to burp, then immediately arf all over self causing the need for an outfit change on Mom & Dad's lap.
3.) Resume nursing but pause to fill pants. Be careful or someone might mistake you for a cappuccino maker in all its bubbling glory. Don't hold back now.
4.) Enjoy a diaper change. While lying down, urp again--this time all down the side of your head and leave a puddle for Mom to mop up & wipe out of your hair. Show everyone what you look like with half your hair dry & sticking up like a peacock while the other is wet and matted to your head. If they were any closer, they'd get a nice fragrant whiff as well.
5.) Once changed and cleaned up, let out a good rip-roaring fart that could put a grown man to shame.

Courtney's tactics must have worked well, because someone...(er um, Erin, nottomentionanynames) said "boy, that baby's got some gastrointestinal issues going on tonight."

Enjoying the Moments

Deer and a Dilly...and All Kinds of Racks

Yesterday Nathan got to go with the guys to the Deer Classic. He was in heaven hanging out with Daddy, Grandpa Prestrud, Uncle Chad & Cousin Ethan. What could be better than guns and 16 point racks, huh? But it gets better...on the way home Grandpa P. got his usual craving for a Dilly Bar from D.Q. Teasing Nathan, Grandpa said he was only going to buy them for Abby, Emily, and Courtney. Nathan immediately piped up with "Courtney doesn't need one!"
"Why doesn't she need one?" Grandpa asked.
"Because my mom's got BOOBS!!!"

Babies Don't Keep

Well...the kitchen floor hasn't been mopped in who knows how long, and the toilet's been collecting grime for weeks...but my dear friend Danielle sent me this poem that speaks to some of that...

Poem by Ruth Hamilton, October 1958

Mother, of mother, come shake out your cloth!
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing and butter the bread,
Sew on a button and make up the bed.
Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She's up in the nursery blissfully rocking!

Oh I've grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue
(Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
(Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peek a-boo).
The shopping's not done and there's nothing for stew
And out in the yard there's a hullabaloo
But I'm playing Kanga and this is my Roo
Look! Aren't her eyes the most wonderful hue?
(Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).

Oh, cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow,
But children grow up, as I've learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs. Dust, go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby. Babies don't keep.

P.S. Thanks Danielle.

Booger Ball

I have just one word for these...USELESS.

She Oughtta Be in Pictures

Courtney Jo...all pretty in pink!

Our wonderful midwife, Fern Aspen...she prayed over us during labor and read Scriptures to me as I coped with contractions. What a blessing.

Once labor got going, it felt a bit fast and furious--and doing it "au natural" was harder than I expected. We had an amazing water birth, though. And once it came to pushing, it just took a few and she was out!

Daddy gives Courtney Jo a bath

Adoring big sisters...little brother is not quite sure what to think yet.

A New Soul

Look who's here!

Courtney Jo Prestrud
Born 9:10pm, February 17, 2009

7 lbs. 13 oz.

20 inches

All are well and brother and sisters are excited.

Thanks and praise to God!

Fear

"There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love." 1 John 4:18

Preface: I'm wrestling out loud a bit with my view of God. Bear with me while I process. When one shares thoughts like this on a heart level, we always run the risk of being misunderstood or judged. But at the same time, I want to be real. And maybe I'm not the only one who has struggled with having a right view of God...

This past weekend I went to a womens' conference at my church. The speaker was a wonderful, joy-filled, 28 year old gal named Tasha Schuh. As a high school student in Ellsworth, WI, she'd been paralyzed when she fell through a trap door during rehearsal for a musical she was in. Her testimony was wonderful, powerful, and God-honoring. I could hear the sniffles around me as everyone was being uplifted, encouraged and challenged. During breaks I nodded in agreement as all the other women I spoke with were sharing how impacted they were by her story. And yet all I could think was "this is terrifying me." Tasha's story is exactly the kind of thing one needs to hear when going through a really difficult time--it was all about God using bad things for good in our lives, and for His glory. But at this time in my life, it simply made me afraid...and yet I know God doesn't want us to live in fear...

If I may share a bit...I became a believer at age 14, so I've been walking with God for a good 20 years now. And I can honestly say that there have been very few times in those 2 decades where I haven't been dealing with some sort of struggle, obstacle or trial. Maybe that's true for most of us? (To be precise, there have been only two times that I can recall...once was a beautiful time of bliss during the year my firstborn Abby was a baby...and the other has been this current school year. Both have been times where I've really thoroughly enjoyed my life and it's felt balanced, with little or no complaints.) Now, I'm not saying I haven't had joy--or peace--God's been faithful to help me choose and experience both in the midst of trials. I'm just saying I wouldn't describe my life as easy overall.

I can remember once in high school, my dear friend & fellow Christian, Abby, (part of the inspiration to name my daughter Abby) had commented to me that everything was going well in her life at the time--no complaints--life was just running smoothly for her and she was content. I remember being struck by the thought that I had never experienced that--never a time where I could say everything was going well. As a Christian, I knew it was expected to face trials ("In this life, you will have trouble..." John 16:33) but it never dawned on me that God might bring calm peaceful seasons of enjoyment as well.

All this to say, I realized at the Tasha Schuh conference that I am much more accustomed to being in a season of trials than I am of the opposite. Over the years I have become very familiar with perseverance, needing to trust, learning to praise Him in spite of--and even for--the difficult things I've experienced. Some of these difficulties have meant hanging in there over the long haul--years even, when I could see no way out and not much hope of things improving. Through all of this, I am fully convinced of Romans 8:28, that God works all things for good for those who love Him. (In essence, Tasha's message.) I also realized that it's almost become comfortable for me to live in the midst of trials and yet still trust and praise and seek Him--knowing He is faithful.

But what is not so comfortable for me are these rare seasons of truly enjoying balance and good things in my life. It's like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop, or for God to somehow yank it all away. So when Tasha was speaking, I wondered what horrible thing God might be trying to prepare me for next. And yet I know this kind of thinking is not what He'd want for me. Fear is something the enemy would love to use to take me down and distract me from what is actually true about God.

So I'm realizing that I have a lot to learn in order to see God as He really is--a loving Heavenly Father Who loves to give His children good gifts. "Who of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone?" (Matthew 7:9) Honestly, I even wrestle with that verse--because I know many people who have asked God for something good--healing for example--and do not receive it. In fact, this same friend Abby that I've mentioned has gone through some excruciating times in her life--especially this past year. A very Jobesque time of losing a child as well as extreme health issues that never seem to get better. I know, I know--healing is not the ultimate good--God's presence is. Heaven is. Life on earth is not the ultimate fulfillment. I'm just saying...

So I've been praying--even over these months where I've really enjoyed my life--for God to help me not to be afraid. To enjoy the many blessings He's given without living in tentative fear of the next bad thing.

"God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him" John Piper

Update...almost 38 weeks

I'll be 38 weeks tomorrow. Saw my midwife yesterday. I'm 90% effaced and a little more dilated-- 2 plus cm. Having periodic bouts of cramping and/or some painful contractions, but nothing very regular. Then I sometimes go for hours or even days of things being pretty calm. I do feel like it will be "soon." But it's anyone's guess really.